Honey, I really shouldn’t have come in and disturbed you in your sleep. Poor thing. You’re such a good boy. Always there for your mother, and now, well, I just needed to see my sweet boy. It’s my birthday after all, and I don’t know that anything at all can console me after finding your father absent yet again.

How am I to feel special on my birthday?? No, honey. I’m just so, so sad. There’s nothing you can do to make me feel better, but you’re so very sweet for wanting to. Oh? Well, maybe a massage WOULD relax me… I’m just so shaken up by the whole thing, so depressed this evening. Mmmmm… that feels so good. Where did you learn to do that? Oh, let me remove my velvet robe for you, darling. Mmmm… you make your mom feel so good. I’m so relaxed now. Oh, yes, that feels GREAT on my lower back. Oh, you’re going to get on top of me to massage me better? Oh, you have magic hands! Mmmm… mmmmm… is that… ohhhhh… you’re wiggling around so much, but that feels so good… Honey, stop. It’s just… will you just massage my poor aching feet for me? Yes, just stand up and use those gentle fingers… oh, oh! Oh, they work wonderfully on my calves too… and my thighs… and… oh… OH! mmmmmMMMM!!! Oh, honey… oh, it’s happening again… yes… is that your… oh, your fingers feel so BIG… that must be your thumb… ohhhhh! Oh, oh, I think that’s enough. You made your mummy feel so… good. Let’s just… let’s just go to bed now, okay?
Oh, wait. Honey, why are your pants unzipped? Did you… was that… oh, don’t tell me!

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